Flashbacks just happenโฆ You think about it when you see little children playing outside or walking with their parents. Maybe you have nightmare visitations from your baby. You hear the vacuum cleaner or garbage disposal or you see a needle or you see the kitchen knives or hear a baby crying - and you remember the procedure. You read the news about a little child who died and all of a sudden, you remember y our abortion. You read or hear about someone who is pregnant and you remember.
Memories seem to come back suddenly and without warning. So not true! You feel like you were duped and tricked by everyone around you who suggested you have an abortion. Now, you realize they never cared about you but only cared about their right to do whatever they want. It blows your mind. You now realize your career was not worth it. He left you, they seem distant. You're angry at yourself and now wondering how you could be so gullible and vulnerable.
You seem to be angry at all men now because of what one man did. You seem to be angry at all women because of what a few women suggested or insisted. You probably have more anger than you realize that gets expressed in a wide variety of ways and I would like to explore how we might resolve and dissolve that when you set up a time to talk with me You are so sorry and feel so guilty.
You miss your baby and wish you could hold and hug your infant, just once to tell them how you feel. There is no one to comfort you in your loss. The ambivalence of your feelings is what eats away at you. How do you get over the death of your child? How do you just forget about it or just get on with life so easily? An abortion is not easy to forget because a child is not easy to forget. God understands your need to grieve and mourn your loss.
Even though your baby was quite small at the time of your abortion, He never treats this event as something small. He wired you as a woman and as a mother and created that mysterious and permanent bond that only a mother has with her child.
